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Bionicle: The Legend Reborn spoof

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« Reply #40 on: December 18, 2009, 07:45:59 pm »

Chapter 9: The End of the System

Zesk: D...s...th...s...m...n...th.. .nd...f...th...syst..m...wh.. .r...'m...n...ch...rg...?

Click: No, I'm pretty sure it means the end of the system where Glatorian are thrown into a steel cage trap and forced to fight to the death over some worthless piece of-

Mata Nui: I believe that's how the Skrall think the Glatorian System works. =P

Meanwhile in the Kingdom Ultimate Alternate Dimension...

Director (Carl): *grunt* C'mon Director!  We need to get out of here!

Director: (previous): I don't think I can take much more of this...Taco is brutal. We barely managed to take out his Vahki, let alone Taco himself.

Carl: NO MAN GETS LEFT BEHIND!

Director: *gets hit by a blast of Hot Sauce* YOWWWWWWWWWWCH!!! *falls unconcious*

Carl: Nooo! Director!! *picks up the Director* We've got to-urgn-get out of here.

Taco: Not if I have anything to say about it! You won't be able to flee before I make you drop all of your coins!!

Carl: *uses Kanohi Olmak to head to Toa Empire Universe*

Carl: *shoves a 1-Up Mushroom down the Director's mouth*

Taco: They can run, but they cannot hide. Vahki, Nyrah Ghosts, PREPARE THE INTERDIMENSIONAL SHIP!!! Taco and his top soldiers get in a giant, machine with a drill at the end of it* So happy to have hijacked this from the Monty Moles in Bowser's Inside Story. Heheheh. >=D

They power up the ship, setting a course to the dimension Taco remembers so well...the one he was cruelly exiled from. "Yes, it's clear to me. I MUST HAVE MY REVENGE. MY REVENGE...ON MATA NUI"

Back on Bara Magna, the gang has arrived in Tesera.

Gresh: Ah, it's good to be home.

Mata Nui: And it was also good that you sounded like Falco from SSBB in that line.

Gresh: I know. It's weird.

Click: Now he's Homer Simpson...HE HAS MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES!! =OOOOOO

Berix: *nervous*

Kiina: Why so jumpy thief? Rip someone off around here recently?

Berix: Well technically, I only ripped off part of them. Evil

Kiina, Mata Nui and Ackar: O_O

Click: Note to self...sometimes danger comes in small packages.

Berix: *notices a blade* Ooooh, shiny! MUSTHAVEMUSTHAVEMUUUUUSTHAAAA VE. *grabs*

Kiina: Hey! Put that back!

Berix: You know, if it was of any value to anyone, they wouldn't leave it lying in the street unguarded.

Kiina: ...meh. I still don't-

Gresh: Oh, nice blade. Where'd you get it? That thing's awesome.

Kiina:...I guess it couldn't hurt if you hung on to it. (very loudly) You can have that Berix. I won't be a killjoy.

Gresh: That's cool, Kiina. =)

Kiina: Yeah I know. Just like you. heart

The gang enters the arena

Ackar: We have to stop this now.

Kiina: It's too late. There's nothing you can do noooow...they're finished. Evil

Everyone else: O_o

Announcer: And now we begin...VASTUS VERSUS TAAAAAAARIIIIIIX!

Click: How long has there been an announcer?

Mata Nui: IDK.

A giant metal cage falls on the two of them, and-

Click: I WAS RIGHT! Wooo!

Ackar: STOOOOOP!

Everyone else: *stares at Ackar* ...

Ackar: The Bone Hunters and Skrall have teamed up to-

Various Agori: What?? We can't hear you!!

Ackar: Sorry! It's this danged microphone...I should have replaced it 5000 years ago. Literally.

*fiddles with it*

The Bone Hunters and Skrall have teamed up!!

Raanu: That's ridiculous! The Bone Hunters and Skrall are each other's worst enemies.

Ackar: They destroyed Tajun!

Kiina: It's true, Tarix! They obliterated our village.

Tarix: *pipe falls out of his mouth* Ack! Can't *gasp* breath! *falls to the ground unconcious*

Berix: *runs up to him* *rubs the electric thingys together* CLEAAAAR! *zaps Tarix* *puts tube back in his mouth, and the pipe instantly starts pumping water back into Tarix's mouth*

Tarix: *breaths* Ah, water. Thanks, Berix.

Berix: NP. I'm happy to have two Glatorian who owe me their lives. Heheheh. >=D And I always wondered what that pipe was for.

Metus: Alright people, calm down, calm down. No need to panic.

Rex: We should panic?

Ackar: YES!

Metus: NO!

Mata Nui: MAYBE! Can we focus, people?!

Gresh: Focus on what?

Mata Nui: *facepalm*

Raanu and Metus: Why should we believe you?

Tarix: Because I just passed almost died hearing the news. It would be sort of embarrassing if it turned out nothing was wrong.

Kiina: Yes, it's true, Tarix. Even Gresh's massive hunkiness wasn't enough to stop-

Ackar: WILL YOU STOP FLIRTING WITH HIM ALREADY!!

Gresh: She's been flirting with me?

Everyone except Gresh: *facepalm*

Kiina: Yes, Gresh, I love you. I thought I made that clear.

Click: Actually, the Writer has just been trying to communicate through Kiina that he's a Kiina/Gresh shipper.

Me: Yes, yes I am. And if you don't get back on the story, I will force you all to experience the Curse of the Bus.

Tarix: What's that?

Me: Glad you asked. >=D The curse of the Bus is something a friend and I created IRL. It is where a Bionicle Character (the way we did it, your set form was the victim) is cursed to be hit by 1000 (imaginary) buses every day for the REST OF YOUR LIIIIIIFE. >=D

Tarix: That's ridi-*gets run over by a bus* Just a coinc-*another bus* I'm sure it's just a new reroute. If I just get out of the road, I'll be fine. *steps to the right* See, no buses here. *a bus falls out of the sky and crushes him*

Me: And now we shall get back to the story.

Ackar: You guys want proof? How about this? Mata Nui has the power to stop them.

Raanu: Actually, that's just another lie.

Ackar: O RLY?? *shoots a giant ray of fire into the air*

Everyone: =O

Ackar: He can lead us to victory over the Skrall. *points in Mata Nui's direction*

Click: Yes, I can lead you all to victory!!

Mata Nui: He was pointing at me. He just didn't look at me and his finger ended up pointing at you. And before the Writer is forced to explain this when someone asks in a post-chapter comment, I can now speak Scarabax.

Click: ...We really shouldn't keep talking about the Writer. I don't want the Fourth Wall to come back to bite us.

Mata Nui: Throw me your weapon, Tarix!

Tarix: *looks at Vastus*

Vastus: *gestures toward Mata Nui* Go on.

Tarix: *throwes his swords up to Mata Nui...even though he was seen with the powered-up swords in Glatorian Comics 1 and 2, and in his set form...*

Tarix: Wh-what are you going to do with them?

Mata Nui: Burn them, stomp their ashes into the ground, dig up the ground and throw it in a car compactor. Geez, why do you sound so afraid? I'm going to power them up, duh. *presses them against his mask*

Instantly, the swords power up into awesome Water Swords.

Mata Nui: *throws them down to Tarix*

Ackar: What more proof do you need?

Metus: Maybe that mask trasforming me into some hideous creature? Nah, that'll never happen.
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by that logic, cheese graters do not exist, as they are not graters made of cheese.
Quote from: My Best Friend
Do you just make everything I say into a quote?
Quote from: Gandalf
"You've found Narnia, Harry."
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