Bionicle: The Legend Reborn spoof

[Magical Girl Mimi]

Hmm... What show? I think I may know it, but at the same time, I don't...

[Ddude The Insane]

Phineas and Ferb. =P

Carl the Intern is one of the minor characters on that show.

It's fun to add little easter eggs like that. It might seem hard, but it ain't. And the Spongebob reference too...I loved the episode Band Geeks. xD

I wonder if I'm posting these too quickly...

Because I just wing it when I write things. All 4 chapters were written with no prep whatsoever. I just make it up as I go. =P

[Magical Girl Mimi]

Ah. I noticed your reference to it in the battle chapter, when Mata Nui started to say it. =P

And no, in fact, you might be going too slow... *wants more*

[uraw911]

Yay for Spongebob!!! I like it how Mata says something completely off, and Ackar just goes along with script. Oh and when Mata Nui's talking to the air, it's from comic 4, right?

I just make it up as I go. =P

I do that with anything I write, except when I'm required to write an outline.

[The Truth]

Carl...
 Maybe we'll get a platypus joke next time? =P

[Ddude The Insane]

@uraw-yes. Comic 4. =D

@hero-perhaps...

@Blade-uh-oh. *grabs chair* Back, back you hungry reader! =P

[uraw911]

Hmmmm... the next chapter should be interesting, due to the fact that the paradox counter is at one. You think you could get it in by tonight?

[Ddude The Insane]

Perhaps. And Carl will be taking over the movie by the end of the next chapter.

But don't be alarmed, this isn't the end of the Director. He'll just be on hiatus for a few chapters.

[uraw911]

Oh no! Carl is a little smart yet dumb.

Are firefighters gonna be spraying him down?

[Ddude The Insane]

Oh no, it will be much more interesting than that. >=D

EDIT: It's he-ere. =D

Chapter Five: Desert Battle

Kiina, Ackar, Mata Nui and Click are riding through the desert on their Thornatus-

Metus: CARJACKERS! THEY GOT AWAY!! *runs to meet up with the Bone Hunters* They went that way...

Director: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! GET OFF THE SCREEN! YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO REVEAL THE AWFUL TRUTH UNTIL CHAPTER 7!

Metus: Err, that's what I would say if I was Metus...but I'm actually...um...some random Ice Agori.

Director: >_<

-but as they get further in, Ackar grows tense.

Ackar: I don't like this!

Click: Well duh. Aren't you reading the narration?

Ackar: This is the perfect place for an ambush.

Kiina: Please. Even Bone Huners wouldn't be crazy enough to chase THREE Glatorian. And if it came to it, we could throw Mata Nui and his beetle to them and floor it.

Mata Nui and Click:

Kiina: Why do you even keep that beetle around? Is it your pet?

Click: This "it" has a gender.

Kiina: What do you call him? Click?

Mata Nui: Yes, that is a fitting name...I shall call him Micheal!

Kiina:

Mata Nui: Alright, Click works...

Click: What, I don't have a say in naming myself??

Taco: Well it's not like babies name themselves.

Click: ...you calling me a baby? YOU CALLIN' ME A BABY!?

Taco: What does it mean when he makes those clicking noises?

Director: I don't know. But it's so darn cute.

Click: YOU GUYS CAN'T EVEN UNDERSTAND ME!?

Taco: Of course we can't.

Click: Then why did you just-

Taco: I mean, that's what I'd say if I had any clue what he was saying. I wonder if he just makes those clicks randomly? His brain is so tiny...

Click: >_<

Ackar: They're getting bolder! Skrall too! In the past months they seem to know our every move.

Mata Nui: When an enemy knows too much it can only mean one thing: a traitor!

Ackar: I was thinking the same thing: It must mean they have a personal trainer.

Mata Nui: NO, I SAID TRAITOR!

Ackar: Whaaaat?? I can't here you over this doggone wind.

Mata Nui: So, I wonder who it could be...*everyone stares at Click*

Click: What? Why's everyone staring? Why are you getting out that shoooe? Sweet mama, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT ROLLED UP MAGAZINE?!?
Mata Nui: *takes rolled up magazine*

Click: *braces*

Mata Nui: *throws magazine onto the road, and about 10 seconds later, a Rock Steed trips on it, promptly faceplanting itself into the sand and flinging its rider towards a rock wall*

Ackar: I told you they know our every move.

Bone Hunter: Don't pick your nose Ackar, the camera is about to turn to you!

Cameraman and Ackar: O_O He's a psychic!

Kiina: Hang on tight! *floors it* *throwes dummies that look like Mata Nui and Click behind them* I told you it would help to bring Gata Rui and Slick along. =D

Bone Hunters: *fire Thornaxes at the foursome*

Kiina: Um, guys? I think we have a bigger problem! Look!

Skopio rises out of the sand, somehow being able to hide down there so long.

Skopio: *Screech* No wait, that didn't come out right. *growl* Wait, one more time. *ROOOOOAR* Much better.

Kiina: ...Aagh! Spider! Hold me Gresh!

Skopio: *facepalm* I'm a *due to lifting up one if his legs to facepalm, Skopio falls over* Ouchie.

Ackar: Ok, I have a plan...*grabs Taco*

Taco: Wait, what are you doi-aah! *Ackar throws Taco up onto the controls of Skopio* Muwhaha. I AM IN CONTROL! *fires Thornax laucher at the Bone Hunters* *evil laugh* BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM!

Director: This is why I never leave Taco alone with the microwave.

With the Bone Hunters all blown up, Taco proceeds to use Skopio to knock over the Thornatus.
Taco: Surrender to me, lower-priced vehicles and canister sets!

Mata Nui: I have an idea. You two, get to the chariot.

Click: I don't really think Sahmad will want to hand over the Baranus V7. Unless of course you were referring to the Thornatus, which is nowhere near the definition of a chariot.

Mata Nui: *climbs up Skopio's leg*

Skopio: Whoa, whoa, hands off the merchandise, bub!

Mata Nui: Surrender, Taco. And get off of the Skopio. *click transforms into a shield, and Mata Nui is fully armed*

Taco: Oh, bring it on, old man! *Taco levitates into the air, and a sword that seems to be made of hot sauce forms in his hands*

Mata Nui: YOU CAN FLY?! What is the Taco place you work at FEEDING you?!

Takua: Oh, I can do much more than fly and generate a flaming sword in my hand. *uses heat to damage the Scarabax Shield*

Click: Ouch! IT BURNS!!!

Mata Nui: Thankfully, Click is in shield form, so he feels no pain at all. =)

Taco's heat sword suddenly materializes into an actual sword.

Taco: *swings sword*

Mata Nui: *blocks with shield*

Taco: *knocks Scarabax Shield into the wall*

Click: Ouuuch.

Taco: *knocks MN's sword away* Concede. Yield to me, and this goes no further.

Mata Nui: Wrong chapter. =P

Taco: Now meet the fate of the defeated!

Mata Nui: ...and that line was from a Bionicle Comic.

As Taco prepares to deal Mata Nui the finishing blow, Kiina floors it on the Thornatus, and she and Ackar zoom away.

What will happen next?? Tune in next time to...Chapter 5^1/2!!

...which will be up later.

[Magical Girl Mimi]

Well that was certainly interesting, and Taco's gone rogue. =P

[Ddude The Insane]

Yeah. I think that was the best chapter so far. It was definately the most fun to make. =P

Chapter 5^1/2: The Epic Chapter

Previously on Bionicle: The Legend Reborn Spoof-Taco reveals his powers that he obtained due to exposure to the nuclear radiation they put in Flamin' Hot Tacos-

Director: I knew there was something...funky in those tacos. *burps out fire* O___o

And has put himself into the movie. He has taken out the Bone Hunters, but taken  over Skopio. Mata Nui now challenges him in a sword duel. Meanwhile, Kiina and Ackar are getting the heck out of there

Mata Nui: *swings sword*

Taco: *is knocked back onto a rock floating on the lava in-wait, what the heck? Where'd all this lava come from!?*

Mata Nui: *hops off skopio and shoots him with a Tranquilizer Gun* Surrender Taco. I have the higher ground.

Taco: You underestimate my powers.

Director: Really? A Star Wars reference? That explains the lava, I guess.

Taco: *flies up onto the big rock Mata Nui is standing*

Mata Nui: *uses sword to knock Taco into the lava*

Taco: OUCH! *dissappears from the screen*'

Mata Nui: That was easy.

Taco comes floating onto the screen in an air bubble, and begins shaking-

Director: And now a NSMBWii reference? I'm suprised Grim hasn't-*Paradox counter resets to 0 and Taco dissapears in a brilliant burst of light* Uh-oh.

Grim Reaper: *appears* Your time has come, Director. *incinerates Director*

Director: That's what you think!

Reaper: Whaa!? I just incinerated you!

Director: That was my clone. I was prepared for this, so at the end of Chapter 5, I replaced myself with this clone and went out on a quest for the Kanohi Olmak. So long, sucker! *teleports to the Kingdom Ultimate Alternate Universe*

Well, I should be safe here for a while.

Taco, Spongebob Mad Hatter, Waluigians, Takua, and Vakama: Hi Director!

Director: Seriously? SERIOUSLY!? He just takes you here? This is ridiculous.

Taco: No, what's really ridiculous is this: VISORAK, CHAAAAARGE!

The Visorak capture the Director and hang him up in a web.

Taco: What's really ridiculous is that the seven of us conquered this whole Universe. >=D And you will plummet to your doom from that web...I'd say "Turn into a hideous freak as well", but you're already one. =P

Director:

The webbing is starting to break...

Back to the action

Carl: ...I guess I'm the director now. Glad all that's over.

Mata Nui: The reign of the previous director or Taco?

New Director (Carl): The reign of the previous director. =P

Grim Reaper: Meh, I don't think this movie is going to be a big problem, so I think I can let all of your paradox hazards slide.

New Director: Lemme guess, you only gave the Director that Paradox Counter because you hated him?

Grim Reaper: Yes. I' not really the paradox enforcer.
Mata Nui: Well, that takes care of-

Skopio: ROOOOOOAR!

Mata nui: OH NO!

But suddenly, a green furry figure with a strange hat appears out of nowhere and kicks Skopio into the lava.

Mata Nui: I don't know what just happened...but cool!

The Skopio (the vehicle based off of Skopio) falls out of the sky convieniently, and Mata Nui  and Click, who has returned to normal get in.

Kiina: I wonder if we should have stayed behind for Mata Nui...

Ackar: Meh, he's probably Skopio Lunch by now.

Kiina: Then what's that thing I see in the mirror??

Mata Nui and Click: *catch up with the two and get onto the Thornatus V9*

Ackar: Erm...I knew you'd defeat them!

Mata Nui: Fine, I'll let you get away with it this once. Only because you owe me.

Kiina: And because I can help you get into the secret ca-OH MY GOODNESS!

As Kiina, Mata Nui, Ackar and Click approach Tajun, it looks totally normal except nobody is there.

Mata Nui: Is that...?

Ackar: Kiina's village.

Mata Nui: I was going to say "Bikini Bottom".

New Director:

[Magical Girl Mimi]

What was that green furry thing with a hat? =P

[Ddude The Insane]

It was what Herochild requested. =P

Ok, I'll admit 5^1/2 wasn't as great as I wanted. but it was at least a bit more epic than the others, and it WAS a 1/2 chapter. =

[uraw911]

It's... Peeeerrrrrry!!! (pronounced how that lady says it whenever Perry's going to his secret lair )

lol, I somehow knew the director would clone himself. Oh, and for this whole time until now, I thought Click was actually talking. xD Thanks for telling me.

[Ddude The Insane]

Chapter 6: Arrival in Tajun

Kiina, Ackar, Mata Nui and Click arrive in Tajun, only to find the place trashed. And I mean TRASHED. BIG TIME. 'course, it probably isn't that different from what it used to look like-

Kiina: SHUT UP ALREADY! I'm kind of having a moment here! My village is ruined.

Ackar: It doesn't actually look that different, really. Just no Agori and I think I see smoke from some sort of bonfire.

Tuma: Hold up your eggnog and take another swig!

Ackar: It's worse than I thought....they've gone country!! Dx

Click: I happen to like Country music. And I'm pretty sure the author does too. =P

Kiina: This is all my fault...if I had been here this wouldn't have happened....Tarix! He was out in Tesera for a practice match...and Gresh! He was here for a training section earlier today! He would have been TOTALLY creamed by the Skrall...because I mean really, those guys are awesome.  They could cream any army, let alone one Rookie Glator-

Director: WE GET IT ALREADY!

Suddenly, Gresh comes limping out of Tajun...badly injured.

Kiina: It's Gresh! And he's hurt! I'm so sorry that this happened sweet-

Ackar: You do realize that this is supposed to be an action movie? Now just go help him already. *Ackar and Kiina go over to support Gresh*

Mata Nui: The boy seems to be hurt...

Ackar: Yeah, thanks Captain Schizophrentic.

Gresh: Bone Hunters and Skrall...working together...

Ackar: That's redonkulos...even more redonkulos than the Earth not being flat.

Gresh: C'mon guys, I'm fi-*collapses*

Kiina: Lemme go check... *Kiina walks up onto a large rock formation*

Tuma: *gives various orders to Bone Hunters*

Kiina: OMIGOSH...it's true! Bone Hunters and Skrall working together! Ackar! Ackar!! ACKAR!!! You've got to come see this!!

The Bone Hunters and Skrall walk off to somewhere as Ackar appears.

Ackar:... Ok, I give up. Where are the Bone Hunters and Skrall you mentioned?

Kiina: *turns around and sees they're gone* But...but...they were RIGHT THERE!!

Ackar: Oh great...she's delusional. O_O

Mata Nui: Perhaps we should go to this cave of yours Kiina...unless you made it up and were just hungry for attention.

Kiina: That's a good idea though.

Kiina and Ackar carry Gresh into the cave while Mata Nui and Click follow...

Kiina: Um, Mata Nui? "Mr. Former Ruler of the Universe"? You too good to do physical labor? Gresh's hunkiness and manliness make him very hard to carry.

Ackar: Youo know, now is a bad time to hit on him. He's like, dying. You know, nothing major.

Gresh: Yeah, what he said.

Kiina touches her staff to the stone wall in front of them, and it opens up.

Mata Nui: The Force is strong in this one. Very strong indeed.

They enter the room, and lay down Gresh on a strange table that seems rather small for people who create so many gigantic things...

Mata Nui: This seems rather odd...why do the Great Beings have such a tiny lab?

Kiina: Dude, aren't you reading the narration? That same EXACT question was asked ONE LINE ago and now you're

Ackar: GUYS, STOP! These jokes are getting lamer and lamer and Gresh is on his deathbed!

Kiina: Actually, he's on his death table. Heh heh.

Ackar: Case in point.

Mata Nui stares at strange writing at the wall written in Matoran...even though it's only gibberish...

Mata Nui: Oh dear....OH BOY...the Great Beings are...are...are....ILLITERATE!! =O

Kiina: We need to do something...

Ackar: *checks him* He's still alive.

Mata Nui: But not for long. Heheheh. *pulls blunt knife out of belt*

Click: Wait, how long has he had a belt?

Suddenly, there is a noise from the corner...Kiina, Ackar and Mata Nui draw their weapons. Click braces himself for impending doom...

Berix: Don't attack! It's just me! Berix! Your trusty Agori future chronicler and the much-needed comic relief guy to replace Click!

Click: All I heard was blah blah blah replace blah blah blah Click. And I don't like what I'm hearing. D=

Kiina: YOU! You dirty little theif! I told you if I ever saw you in here again I'd- *lunges toward Berix*

Ackar: WHOAWHOAWHOA. Hold up, kids. Don't fight. We can reslove this peacefu-*Kiina shoves Ackar out of the way*

Kiina: YAAAAAH!

Berix: *scream* *dodges*

Ackar: *sigh* STOP IT NAO!

Berix: Wait, wait! I can help Gresh!

Kiina: Yeah, help him die. =P

Berix: No, I can heal him. I've had to patch myself up a few times-

Kiina: After you get mauled for STEALING.

Berix: Col-lect-ing. And I have the right to collect whatever I want.

Mata Nui: *checks Matoran Universe Constitution* Nope, that right isn't in here.

Berix: *holds up Scroll of Laws of Bara Magna* Yes, but it says in here I can! See! Right there.

Kiina: That's the 3rd Version. We're currently in Version 7. Besides, where'd you get that?

Berix: ...found it.

Gresh: Still dying here. Just thought I'd mention that.

Ackar, Mata Nui, Kiina, Berix and Click: Yeah, well, nobody cares.

[uraw911]

Everybody hates Gresh now. D= But, ZLS did say he was top heavy. I like the SW reference because MN's saying it, and he's sounds like Vader. Is chapter 7 coming today still? Oh, and what happened to the old director?

[Ddude The Insane]

Sadly, no. Chapter 7 will be tommorow. And, to anwser your question, Carl is pretty much the Director persona now. However, to make up for it, I changed the opening of Chapter One, and here comes the Tuma Battle Teaser:

Chapter (Unknown): Conflict With Tuma

Tuma: Well, well, the coward has come for a battle.

Mata Nui: Are you willing to fight me alone? Or are you the true coward?

Tuma: NO ONE CALLS TUMA A COWARD! I WILL FIGHT YOU ALONE!

Mata Nui: Heheh. Sucker.

Tuma: Are you ready to Duel, Mata Nui?

Mata Nui: Yes. And I'll start by summoning my Winged Kuriboh card!

Tuma: Wrong kind of duel!

Mata Nui: Alright. If you're not a coward, are you willing to let me choose our type of battle?

Tuma: Um....sure.

Mata Nui: Then I choose....a Dance-off! Whoever scores the highest on this dancing video game wins!

Me: The plague of dance is coming...

Mata Nui: You can start.

Tuma: *dancez hard on the arcade-style dancing game* Oh yeah, I am good! *slips up and falls on his back* Aaagh!!

Machine: Your final score is...7023.

Tuma: I *grunt* have this one in the bag. Heheh.

Mata Nui: *starts dancing*

Tuma: Oh my...he's good....he keeps getting excellents...Oh My Goodness....hez over 9000!!!


I'll let you all ponder what happens next.

[Ddude The Insane]

Chapter 7: The Cave

Director: These chapters are getting lamer and lamer names.

Zesk: W..ll, ...m...t...b...sy...t...c..m. ..p...w...th...g...d...n...m. .s. *typetypetype*

Meanwhile in the Kingdom Ultimate Dimension

Previous Director: I can't believe this has all happened...Taco has taken over a dimension, and I'm the only one who can stop him. I was lucky to escape those webs unmutated...I guess I am a hideous freak. -_-

Various Vahki designed by Taco: Surrender, or we will be forced to use our Staffs of Incineration to...

Previous Director: To what?

Vahki: ...Incinerate you. The title is sort of obvious. I mean, what did you think they did, make you cookies?!

Another Vahki: Vahki V089 to Emporer Tacotine-we have isolated the rebel. Awaiting your arrival and orders.

Emporer Tacotine: Preparing to arrive. I will personally destroy the Previous Director. Keep him busy until I arrive.

Back to the Secret Lab of the Great Beings

Gresh: Um, well, you are debating over whether to save my life. So you actually DO care that I'm dy-*Gresh dies*

Kiina: NOO!

Director: Don't worry, I planned ahead for this. I was sure at least a few actors would die in this movie. So, I cloned all of you about an hour ago. We have a perfect clone of Gresh right here, injured and everything. *Gresh's clone lays down on the table*

Gresh (clone, to be referred to henceforth simply as Gresh): Still dying here.

Berix: C'mon, I can help him?

Ackar: ...very well.

Kiina: What if he's the traitor?

Ackar: Then he'll pay. There's a $250,000 fine for betraying any village.

Kiina: O_____O That's more money than all of the money on Bara Magna.

Ackar: I know. Stupid inflation...

Mata Nui stares at a huge door....thing in front of him.

Mata Nui: What lies beyond here?

Kiina: Dunno. I doubt anything "lies" beyond there, though. I mean, why would there be anything beyond there that lies? There's nothing alive in there, most likely. So there's no way something in there could be dishonest.

Mata Nui:

Kiina: Anyway...I've never been able to get it open.

Berix: Neither have I.

Kiina: Just focus on what you're doing, theif.

Berix: Collector. And if I was even focusing to start with, I wouldn't be on Gresh's 18th clone by now.

Director: The 18th and FINAL. So don't mess this up.

Berix: *fiddles with some sort of vine*

Gresh: Can I have my windpipe back now?? *gaaaasp*

Mata Nui: *Walks up to wall*

Suddenly, The Mask of Life and and Wall start glowing. Everyone raises their weapon, except for Gresh and Berix, who for some reason have no weapons.

Mata Nui: It opened....

Ackar: You really need to see a doctor for that schizophrenia of yours.

Click: Duuude, I've told him that like a million times.

Mata Nui, Click, Ackar and Kiina walk in.

Mata Nui: Hm...this writing supports my theory...the Great Beings are indeed illiterate, or at least were at some point.

Kiina: Great Beings? Great Destroyers is more like it.

Mata Nui: Why do you speak against the Great Beings with a line that was supposed to be used in the last chapter?

Kiina: Because this *points at the chamber* was Bara Magna before the Great Beings came along and ruined us.

Me: What? I forget lines sometimes. I don't have the DVD, so it's not like I can watch it wheneva I want. But I didn't want those lines to go to waste. =P

Ackar: You do not know that Kiina. The Great Beings could have just as easily fallen here.

Mata Nui: No, that did not happen. They probably sat down here. *gasp* It cannot be.

Ackar: What't wrong? You look like you've just seen a a ghost, whatever that is.

Mata Nui: Technically, there are Nyrah Ghosts, but, um...oh forget it. Not far from it. *points at drawing of a giant robot on the wall*

Ackar and Kiina: *gasp*

Mata Nui: A robot, much like the one I used to use to rule over my ppl...

Click: Um, actually, I'm pretty sure that IS the robot you used to be. Get your facts straight.

For someunknowm reason, they leave the room without doing anything else.

Outside, two Bone Hunters are standing around.

Fero: Why am I partnered? It said very clearly in Raid on Vulcanus I hate sharing. I'd prefer to just loot everything I see.

Other Bone Hunter: I'm just here to be an extra. Although I thought we all got killed by that psycho guy in a Taco costume and that huge Scorpion thing.

Ackar: *bangs their heads together, knocking them unconcious*

Mata Nui: ...Aren't those helmets supposed to prevent that from happening??

Ackar: Who caaares?

Kiina: You OK Gresh? sweetie?

Gresh: Yup, thanks to Berix and Dr. Dollitle. And, on an unrelated note, I really should get petition for Tajun to improve their helathcare. I mean, what kind of idiot sets up the city to only have ONE hospital, and a guy who's good at fixing things?

Metus: Wait, I thought the Director said the awful truth that I was the traitor to all of the villages was going to be revealed in this chapter. What happened to me coming out of nowhere and saying that?

Director: >__<

[Ddude The Insane]

No comments? Nothing? Ah well.

Chapter 8: Ride to Tesera

Director: You know, being a Director is kind of lame. It was funnier when the old Director was in charge...for some reason...*leaves* Zesk, you're in charge of the movie until I return.

Zesk: *typetypetype*

Mata Nui: So, how are you doing Gresh?

Gresh: Fine, thanks to Berix and duct tape.

Berix: But mostly duct tape. *pokes some of the tape on Gresh* The wound under there should heal in 4-6 years.

Gresh: Don't you mean 4-6 months?

Berix-nah. Time goes slowly on Bara Magna. How else could Ackar be so old?

Ackar: *disintegrates*

Turaga Dume: *uses Mask of Regeneration*

Ackar: Thanks. But aren't you supposed to be in the Coliseum?

Dume: *throwes smoke pellet onto the ground in front of him* *when the smoke clears, he is gone*

Mata Nui: Thank you all for your help. But it is time we parted ways.

Master Shifu: No, Master Oogway! Don't go!

Mata Nui:

Gresh: You're leaving us?

Kiina: Yeah, you're leaving us? *stares at Gresh dreamily*

Gresh: Wait, aren't you supposed to be in love with the fire character?

Kiina: Nah, that's ridiculous. Why would I like a guy who shoots fire from his hands?

Gali and Nokama: D=

Gresh: But why are you leaving?

Mata Nui: Because Kiina is love-crazy, you're a wimpy fighter, Ackar is an old fart and I'm not even taking a chance on Berix.

Berix: I can fix that robot you'll be using in '10.

Deep-voiced guy: ...Featuring The Mata Nuis and their giant robot. This Madden is the Madden. Madden '10. E. A. Sports. 'ts in the game.

Mata Nui: I'm sorry. But Click and I must continue our quest.

Click: Duuuude, I'm just coming along because you killed my sister.

Mata Nui: No, Click. I AM your sister!

Click: Nooooooooo!

Zesk: C....n...w....c...t....d..wn. ..n...th...p..p...c..lt...r.. .r...f..r..nc..s...pl...s..?

Click: *grunt* Fine. Wait, how did you understand me, Mata Nui?

Mata Nui: Click, I've spent like what, 7 chapters with you? I'm starting to understand your language by now. Even though your language consists of making the same noise over and over and over again.

Kiina: Great. A ditcher AND a Beetle whisperer. And he's my only hope for getting out of here.

Click: SPECIESIST AND RACIST! SPECIESIST AND RACIST!!

Kiina: Not to mention he has that psychotic beetle.

Ackar: Guys, can we focus on the story here? We're eating up time and we haven't even gotten to the part of the story that involves the title of the chapter.

Kiina: Fine.

Ackar: Mata Nui, I've seen you fight. You're not ready.

Mata Nui: Actually, you were unconcious when I dealt with Strakk, and you were miles away when I fought a giant Scorpion and a mutated Taco Deliveryman. So no, you haven't seen me fight.

Ackar: >_< Look...stay with me and I'll teach you everything I know.

Mata Nui: I've watched Toa Helryx, Hydraxxon, Axxon, Brutaka, The Toa Mata, The Toa Metru, the list goes on. I've learned more than you will ever show me. And besides, what if you charge me for the lessons?

Gresh: Yeah, you're a pretty selfish guy Ackar. You have all those shields, but you haven't donated any of them to charity.

Ackar: I'm doing this for Mata Nui. No one else.

Onewa: Heeeey...where have I heard that line before?

Mata Nui: Fine, I'll stay with you. But what do you want out of this?

Kiina: A new world.

Berix: Respect.

Ackar: To help a friend.

Gresh: A new weapon. My old one is shredded.

Click: You mean that cool, good-condition weapon you're using right there? You know, in Comics 1, 2 and 3, you had the green twin swords you'll be getting later in the chapter. What happened to those? And really? SHREDDED? *calls the grammar police*

Mata Nui: What am I supposed to do? Do I LOOK like I'm made of money?

Click: No, you look like you're made of some cheap yellowish material that lego transforms into gold when rendering you in CGI.

Ackar: Wait...your mask! Couldn't you do to our weapons what you did to Click and the stinger tail?

Mata Nui: Make them fat, ugly and immoblile?

Ackar: No, make them awesome weapons!

Click: Technically, only the tail was a weapon.

Mata Nui: No. I don't understand the workings of the mask-

Berix: Use Biosector01. It's very helpful.

Mata Nui: But I think it only works on things that are...or were alive.

Berix: No problem. Most Glatorian weapons are made of Bone or Claw.

Mata Nui: Where did you guys get cloth out here?

Berix: I said "claw".

Mata Nui: Ah. It sounded like cloth.

Kiina: That a little collector fact, Thief?

Berix: No, it's a Biosector01 fact. =)

Mata Nui: Alright...Ackar, give me your sword.

Ackar: *hands Mata Nui his sword*

Mata Nui: *touches it up against his mask*

Ackar: *gasp* He has the Midas touch! No wonder he's made of gold!

*takes weapon* *points into air* *huge ray of fire shoots into the air*

Click: Is that a jet engine or a sword?

After a lot of arguing, pop culture referencesand cameo appearences, the gang gets started on their ride to Tesera.

Gresh: Oh come on, I've got these EPIC Elemental powers, but you guys won't let me test 'em out.

Ackar: Patience is the first step to becoming a great Glatorian.

Gresh: I thought steroids were.

Ackar: That's the key to becoming a 21st Century Glatorian. We're in like our 100th Century or something.

Kiina: *blasts a giant rock which explodes into a bunch of other rocks*

Manny: Kiina thwoed water at big wock.

The rock lands in front of the Thornatus. Kiina hits the...floor and the car comes to a stop.

Ackar: Why don't these things have electric motors, anyway? Suuuure, the MANAS get motors, but when we start making REAL vehicles...

But you should be more careful with them powers y'got there.

Bohrok-Kal: Yes. They might run out inconveniently...

Kiina: This coming from a guy who almost got killed by a surprise attack. =P

Ackar: -_- Anyway...I think this'd be a good time for your first lesson, Mata Nui. Now tell me, what direction will that bird in the sky next turn to?

Berix: Wait, since when do we have birds?

Mata Nui: Don't know don't care.

Ackar: Correct! *fires Thornax at the bird* *the bird plummets to the ground* You avoided a pointless lesson. Here is your reward. *kicks bird over to him*

After some...Turkey Sandwiches, Ackar and Kiina face off with the powers of Fire and Water.

Gresh: *fires blast of wind which somehow blows away the elemental powers but leaves Kiina and Ackar untouched* I guess I blow you all away! Get it? Blow?

Click and Berix: Laaaaame.

Gresh: >_>

The five arrive in Tesera without incident. Bye Bye Babylon or some other song plays.

Mata Nui: Where is this music coming from?

Click and Gresh: Who cares? I love this song!

Kiina: Me too!

Gresh: Oh wait, never mind. I hate this song.

Kiina: Me too.


EDIT: Rest of Chapter is up!